How do i man up and stop being a coward?

i let everything get to me and stop me from doing what i need to do. i can't talk to new people without getting nervous, it's not the nervousness that gets to me but the fact i don't push through it gets to me. i can't stand up for myself, i worry bout stupid sh*t that a man's not supposed to worry about. people say im just timid and new to get out more, but i don't like the word timid or knowing that i am because that makes me feel like a , a man is not supposed to be timid, i'm a weak azz dude. I need to be shot in my head until all the coward part of my brain disappear, i hate myself, i ain't no man, i'mma female, no i'm not calling women weak or s, i'm just saying that i'm not what a man should be, i'm soft and fukkin weak and timid. my mama spoiled me and that's another reason why i feel i'm the way i am, she's always giving me sh*t when i tell her that i wanna do sh*t for myself she tell me i don't need a job. i'm fukkin 19 and still can't talk to girls, i think that's a problem i'm a weak a** n*gga!